It’s as ubiquitous on Texas highways as the big skies above: the road sign that reads “Drive Friendly – The Texas Way.” The slogan, made official by the state Legislature in 1973, has since served as a welcome reminder that in Texas we try to keep things civil. But as roads get more congested, and road rage more enticing, these rules reinforce our message of fellowship.
mind your critters
While it may seem amusing to let your dog (or ferret or goat) stick its head out the window for public scrutiny, it’s also dangerous. Instead, consider filling your backseat with ants. My daughter has shown me that a spilled juice box or melted bag of Skittles is perfect for enticing new visitors.
consider the sticker
I stand up (and sit down) for my values, and I know you do, too. I just can’t read what your opinions are because my eyesight is going and you keep changing lanes without using your turn signal. Please, buy bumper stickers with bigger fonts and stop making obscene gestures at me as I tailgate you trying to decipher what fringe political ethos you stand for.
Use your horn responsibly
There’s no better way to announce your presence than by honking your horn. But cavalier use, like honking in time to ZZ Top’s “Just Got Paid,” is not what the state Legislature meant. This is why I only honk to slower-tempo pieces in the ZZ Top catalog—in my driveway, to the annoyance of my neighbors.
Don’t panic
There’s a stereotype of Texans as eternally laidback. But sometimes while making a coil turn on a big overpass in Houston, I think about the physics of black holes and hyperventilate into a Whataburger bag. The point: Know your limits. Maybe that means sitting in the passenger seat, where you can cope with your neurosis with minimal distraction.
Practice mindful coexistence
As an only child, I’m averse to sharing, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be civil. I’ll share the road, if I’m legally obligated, but I ask that you please use your mirrors and follow the traffic laws as you negotiate around me pedaling my daughter’s tricycle to the market because I’ve lost my car keys in Barton Springs again.
